Thursday, April 26, 2012

A one-woman circus!

And for my next act....

We're selling our house. A word of advice: If you are going to move, do it BEFORE you have a baby!

We've had two showings already, and I am literally a one-woman side show when I have to get out of the house. I have to chase down two very stubborn cats and put them in the garage while they fight me to get back in. I have to get the dog and put him in the back of the car, and then get the baby in her seat. Then I have to make sure I've hidden any evidence that we live in this house before I leave and run around turning every light on, opening every door and blind, and hope that baby isn't screaming bloody murder since she generally hates her car seat, but it's hard to run around getting everything done quickly with her wiggling in my arms. She is a squirmer!

Once that's all done, then baby goes in the car and we drive around aimlessly for short showings, and hope we have somewhere to go for long ones. The last one was long, so we went for supper, but obviously not something we can do every day...

I hope this house sells fast so I canbe done with all of this! With DH back at work, showings during the day suck, and we only have one car, so driving him to work for 7am sucks too!!

Sunday, April 22, 2012

And more pictures!

Because I can't get enough of my baby girl! :)

I love it when my little spidermonkey smiles. :) She's silly just like her daddy!

She's grown so much, she's actually starting to fill out her chair.

AhhhhHHH!!! I've got bugs on my feet! :)

I love my 'cats in hot air balloons' pj's. :)

I'm just too cute!

Do you think these two are related? We call her mini dad. :)

No question, she is her daddy's girl.

Hanging with dad in her tulip pj's. :)


Here are a couple of pictures of my little spidermonkey. :)

3 weeks

7 weeks

She's a growing girlie. :)

Saturday, April 21, 2012

My experience thus far as a new parent

Being a new parent is a wonderful and terrifying thing. It's intimidating how much you can love another human being that you've never met so completely the minute that she enters your world.

Tonight, Ashley had a random crying fit. It was a hysterical cry and it seemingly came out of nowhere. I have no idea why it happened... Did I snap one of the snaps on her skin when I was changing her? Did something bite her? Does her stomach hurt? Was it just overstimulation? Is she just overtired? What was it? WHAT MADE MY BABY CRY LIKE THAT???!

I can harp on this stuff for hours. I want to know her inside out so that she will never cry like that again! I know it's not realistic, but it's certainly how I feel. I'm now living the largest and most important part of my life in making her happy.

People don't want to lose themselves when they have babies, but you give up so much of yourself in the beginning that major change within is inevitable. Don't get me wrong.. I'm still me, but I'm a mutated strain of myself, and of course I believe this 'mutation' is for the better. I'm a mom now and this new life is so familiar yet foreign at the same time.

I feel so strange about this new relationship at times. When Ashley is awake, I spend so much time trying to get her to sleep so that she's in a good mood and happy, but then when she's asleep in her room, I long to hold her all night to make sure that she is safe. As much as I would love to see her sleep through the night, I can't wait for her 3am feedings just so that I know that she's okay. She's very reassuring with her early morning smiles though, and as grumpy as you want to be that early in the morning, she can just melt your heart right then and there.

Life has changed so much in just this short 7 weeks. My husband and I have changed. I'm seeing a side to him that surprises me. I always knew he would be a loving father but to the extent that this new found love goes, he is as smitten as I am. He's an amazing dad who misses his daughter when he has to work, and who wants to be there to hold her all the time. He's hands on and wants to get right in there to change diapers and learn everything he can about his new role in life. I love seeing this side of him.

As far as me and my husband's relationship goes, we are doing great with each other all things considered. I think we are so focused on Ashley sometimes that we get a little lost, but we do manage to find our way back enough to make sure that we know we are still here.

So far, my experience with parenthood is that it is hard. It's a new level of love, fear, stress, and just life in general. I have moments all the time where I look down at my daughter and think to myself... Oh god, I hope I'm doing this right... But in looking at her, I also see that she's growing. She smiles, and she chatters in the way that infants do. She looks for me when I cross a room, and she's sad if I'm not there. It's an amazing feeling, and I know I must be doing something right for her to make me feel as loved as she does. I love my beautiful daughter so much.

Monday, April 16, 2012

6 weeks

First off, sorry I haven't posted. It's like I've lost the last 6 weeks! It's true what they say, cherish every moment while your baby is young because it flies by so SO fast. I can't believe how big my baby girl is getting!

Little miss Ashley is doing great. I'm exhausted, but I'm enjoying every minute of it, even in those moments where I feel like I'm losing my mind. It's really hard to be grumpy at 3am when you look down at that little face and a huge toothless grin forms on it. Melts my heart every single time. :)

Ashley doesn't nap much during the day, so that has been a bit of a challenge. For a few days I thought we'd kicked her no-napping policy when she would sleep for 3-4 hour stretches in the morning, but that has gone by the wayside again, and we're back to miss cranky pants for several hours a day.

I really can't complain though... she may not nap much during the day, but she has been sleeping fairly well at night. I had to run in to her room and check on her to make sure she was still alive the night that she slept for 7.5 hours! That has only happened once though, she's averaging about 5-6 hours of sleep from 9pm-3am, then another two hours from 4am-6am. It's tough trying adjust myself to those hours, but it's getting easier.

I am smitten with this little girl. I couldn't have asked for a better DD. She makes me laugh all the time with her funny faces, and she's learning, and becoming more aware of her surroundings every day.

She knows who her mom is, and is currently in a phase where mommy has to be in sight when someone else is holding her. Sometimes she's okay alone with dad too. :) It's just so cute when grandma is holding her, and her little eyes are watching me move all around the room. It fills my heart with so much joy to see how much she loves her family already.

The MIL has been giving me a little bit of trouble in that she can be extremely overbearing, but fortunately I'm not the type of person to let it go too far, and I had to tell her to back off when she was here over the weekend. I think that mothers-in-law (in my case anyway) forget that the baby is not theirs to parent, and can have some trouble respecting boundaries. I won't get in to too much detail, but let's just say I headed that behavior off at the pass.

My hormones have been wacko, and still are. I'm still breastfeeding, which I am so proud of, because I never thought I'd be able to do it for more than 3 weeks, but here we are at 6 weeks, after a lot of learning, and tons of nipple pain, and we're still going strong. I hated breast feeding at first because it is so difficult and my baby was cluster-feeding like crazy, but it's true what they say.. It DOES get better. It still has it's moments but for the most part, the pain is gone, and I'm free to just enjoy feeding baby.

Will post some pics later! Pizza is here!