Back from a little trip in the mountains

I went on a little weekend excursion with my mom to the Eastern Townships of Quebec this weekend. It only takes about 3 hours to get there, but it's 3 hours out of the city in to the fresh and refreshing air of the mountains. The Eastern Townships are closest to Vermont. I've never been to Vermont, but have heard that the cycling there is just as awesome as it is on the Quebec side. :)

We stayed at a B&B in Sutton. It was beautiful there. We did a little shopping, and a lot of eating since the food is always so good in the townships. We also got out on the bikes, since the weather was fantastic, and did 27kms from Waterloo to Granby. The bicycle paths are so clean, and nicely paved. There are rest stops along the way at about every kilometer. I wish the cycling routes where I live were this awesome!

I was kind of apprehensive to go on this trip, seeing as I can feel totally fine, then like total crap the next minute.. but I'm happy to report that I felt great the whole time, and I think the biking really helped me to actually gain some of my energy back. I can't say I've felt as great yesterday and today.. but I think that's more or less just because I'm back home/back at work when I wish I was in the townships much MUCH MUCH longer!! :)

Only 3 more days until I am OFFICIALLY in 2nd tri!! :)

I think I'm going to be a manatee :D lol

Here's me at 12 weeks, 2 days pregnant

On the message boards, I see pics of ladies at 15 weeks who have cute little bumps, or bumps just starting to show. I wonder why I'm so big at 12 weeks??? LOL I know it isn't twins, and that I'm not exactly underweight by any means, but holy heck.. if my belly's this big, what the heck's it going to look like in another 6 months??

That being said, I AM SO EXCITED to have this belly!! No one at work has said anything yet. My boss and co-worker in my immediate office know I'm pregnant, but no one else in the building does... If they were questioning it before, they must know by now... haha

My nausea seems to have subsided!! I felt great yesterday, and I'm feeling pretty good today! I hope this continues. I'm really starting to settle right in to this pregnancy... finally!!! :)

The Heartbeat

I met my new OB yesterday. He seems like a really nice guy, which is a welcome change from my RE who we referred to as Dr. Roboto.

Sitting in the waiting room to meet this new doctor, I was surrounded by big pregnant bellied mamas, and their children. Having only ever been to the RE's office, where there are generally no pregnant women (yet) and no children, this was a really strange experience. As I sat there, surrounded by women who seemed so much older and wiser than me (even though I'm 30), I honest to god felt like a teenager sitting there... waiting for someone to tell me what to do and hold my hand to get me somewhere.

I had to fill out a bunch of forms, and the reality/responsibility of adulthood, and becoming a mother hit me full force like a ton of bricks. Don't get me wrong, I'm over the moon to be becoming a mommy after all of this, but the reality of it is so scary. I spent so much time thinking about getting pregnant, I never gave much thought to how my life would change when I actually got pregnant and became a mother. LOL

I guess it didn't help that DH couldn't be there for this appointment because he's out on training for work. I probably wouldn't have felt so overwhelmed had he been there.

After a million and one questions on forms, answered to the nurse, and then the doctor, my doc took out the doppler so that we could look for a heartbeat. He warned me that we might not be able to find it at 12 weeks, but after a little searching, that little heartbeat showed up thumping away at 169bpm, which my doctor said was awesome!

What an exciting thing to hear, but also, and overwhelming thing to hear by myself. I really wish DH would have been there. I feel like it was kind of a defining moment in this pregnancy, because it finally allows me to feel like this is viable, and everything is going to be okay, and DH wasn't there to share it with me.

I didn't cry during my appointment. When I heard the heartbeat, it's like my whole world stopped, and I just sat there awestruck by the sound of it. The rest of the appointment was pretty much a blur, because that little thump-thump sound just blew my mind.

I got in to my car, and that's when I lost it. I just started bawling. I was bawling, because I was so happy that little heartbeat was there for me to hear... and I was just amazed that this is actually happening and that my baby is still in there, still thriving. I was just generally overjoyed.... but also suddenly filled with fear and doubt in my abilities to be a parent. I think I just started feeling so many things that I just kind of exploded, thank goodness I was able to pull myself together before I walked back in to the office.

Later on yesterday, DH called to ask me how the appointment went. He was so excited/jealous that I got to hear the heartbeat and vowed that no matter what, he wouldn't miss another appointment. I'm happy with that. I shared with him every little detail that I could, and I told him my joys, and my fears.. and as DH always does, he reassured me that I'd be an amazing mom, and that I wasn't alone in all of this since we have each other, and we're going to be awesome parents no matter what. :) Damn, I love that man!!

Yesterday was just a crazy, emotional day. It's amazing how just one little tiny sound can mean so much in the grand scheme of things. I went to bed early last night, just to play some catch up since I was feeling so exhausted.

This morning, I woke up and I felt like a new person. I didn't have to drag myself out of bed. I just kept thinking about this baby, and that wonderful sound I heard yesterday, and each time I thought of it, I smiled.

Yesterday was the realization that this is real, and my immediate response to it.

Today is the 'aftermath' of that realization, and the official beginning of my life as a mother.

Yesterday, I was scared, happy, emotional.

Today, I AM SO FREAKIN' EXCITED!!!!!!

And now.. the belly

Our fridge died, so while we were out last night shopping for a new one, our sales person congratulated us on our soon to be addition to the family. I guess my bump is getting more obvious than I thought. It was actually a really cool feeling to finally be found out by a stranger. It makes it all feel like this is more real somehow :)

Here's what I'm working with bumpwise: (and a little comparison)

I think it's strange that my belly seems kinda big already, but I'm so happy to see that bump there!! :)

Pregnancy, and the Internet

Every Monday, I start a new week in to this pregnancy. To commemorate that, I do a simple google of the week I'm on (this week, I'm 11 weeks pregnant, or in my 12th week). I'm always surprised at the information that I find, and how incredibly accurate it is to what symptoms I'm experiencing.

Yesterday's google said that what I might be feeling is "a little angry that the tylenol just isn't cutting it", then it went on to talk about the headaches I'd be experiencing this week. Just a couple of days ago, these headaches started!

A couple of week's ago, my google said that what I might be thinking is "I think I want a watermelon... omg, did you say chocolate chip cookie? Omg, I think I want french fries" (or something to that affect)... and it seriously was exactly what I was thinking.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised since countless amounts of women have been pregnant before me, and I'm likely no different than anyone else... but it's just kind of strange how eerily accurate it is. If I look a few weeks ahead on google, it's like I can see the future. :)

I hope I'm textbook when it comes to the end of first trimester, and all my symptoms just disappear and get replaced with kicking. :)

The Close to final living/dining room

The new chair.

The new couch. Not sure if we're going to keep with this layout, or move the couch to the other side of the room or along the wall. We're going to leave it this way for a bit and see how it works out.

We hadn't seen the table before we bought it (only online). The table is even more awesome in person. Closed, it's only 3ft x 18", but it opens up to seat 8 comfortably. :)

Living room. Small, but functional. :)

This room isn't quite finished yet (still missing baseboards, and a new window covering). But we love our shelf too. :)

I'm so impatient!!!

I just can't wait until I can feel this baby. I know I've got a way to go yet, but I'm going to be so overjoyed the day the flutters start, and I can notice them enough to know that they are kicks. Right now, most days, it doesn't even feel like I'm pregnant, so I just carry on as usual, and nothing feels any different. I've never thrown up or had anything that I feel has really connected me to this pregnancy yet, although I'm sure DH would disagree as all I talk about is the baby, so I must be feeling some connection somewhere on some level, but it still feels like this pregnancy isn't real yet. I know it will start to feel real if I can just get a kick. Come on kid, kick me!!!! :)

I'd also like to actually hear baby's heartbeat. We've been to 3 ultrasounds, 2 of which they got the heartbeat on the ultrasound machine, but they had no sound, so we've never heard it. I know baby's heart is beating and that's a great thing, but I want to HEAR it!!