Monday, September 13, 2010

Sometimes, I am the green monster.

There are some days where everything just seems impossible. You think that you have all your ducks in a row, but when you take a closer look, you see that not all of your ducks are ducks.

When this moment of clarity hits, my first response is to feel angry. I feel like I've been cheated of an easy way to live life carefree. It seems like everyone around me gets whatever they want, and I don't ask for much, but still have to struggle for the crumbs when everyone else gets the whole pie.

I try not to look at life that way, but sometimes it's just hard. We're struggling enough with just trying to find the "right time" to have a family, and just as we think that we've got it figured out and we're moving forward, there's always something that seems to come up and bite us in the butt... an unexpected bill, a phone call, a contract at work...

There's so much that is already so difficult in life, why does having a family have to be so difficult too?

1 comment:

  1. I wrote my own green monster post a week or so ago. The monster visits me a lot when I look at my BIL and SIL - they got married first, got a house first (which they got from a family member dirt cheap and then sold for a huge profit), got pregnant when they weren't even trying (with a girl, which I want), and are now completely remodeling a new house while we wait for ours to close. And they're several years younger than us. It can be hard sometimes. Hope things look up for you!