Monday, February 14, 2011

Looking up!

I have an appointment today to talk with my doctor about what to do with my anxiety. If being in a weird job place has shown me anything, it's that I'm not dealing with my anxiety in a productive way. I worry about EVERYTHING, even when most of my worries are irrational. I figure it's best to get this stuff sorted out before I finally do have children and pass all of my anxiety issues down to them, so I guess I'll see what my doctor has to say. I feel relief in knowing that I'm at least taking the first step towards a healthier me by having made the call... so that is positive. :)

I have also started running. Despite any lack of motivation I may have for exercise, I know that it's necessary, and that sitting around isn't doing me any good. So far, running has helped with my anxiety issues. Despite all the crap that may go on in my day, if I get out and run, I feel a little better, because I can focus on the accomplishment of the half hour of exercise that I've done.

My line of thought right now is that while we're trying to get pregnant, I'm going to try to lose weight. I'm overweight by about 40lbs. Weight never helps with PCOS, so losing it for that purpose will work in my favour, but it also doesn't help with how I feel about myself from day to day, which only adds to my anxieties.

I hope that in taking care of my body and my brain, I will be the healthy person that I want to be. Me being that person will do nothing but good for me, for my relationship with DH and for the future family we will one day have.

There's a light at the end of this tunnel. :)

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