Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Family woes

Without making this in to a really long story.. basically over the past couple of years, my brother and his wife (and consequently my 10 year old niece) have been showing up to less and less family events, and nobody has had any idea of why.

I barely talk to my brother as it is, and when I told him I was pregnant, it seemed as though he could care less.... It's not like I expect him to jump up and down, but his congratulations was really half-assed through email... but, being the sometimes understanding person I can be, I let it go.

Well, about 2 weeks ago, we went out for supper with my parents and when we got back to their place, my brother was sitting in his car outside their house. He saw us all, and my mom went up to him to kind of wave at him and say "We'll see you inside" (he was on the phone), so we all went in thinking he'd stop in and say hi. Well, 5 mins later, we look out the window, and he's gone! I haven't seen him in literally MONTHS, and he can't even come in just to say a quick hello? Seriously... he could have just come in and said "I'm on my way to do whatever, but just wanted to say hi..."

Anyway.... as I do with most things, I brushed it off.... Then the Sunday before last was my brother's b-day. He invited my parents, and some other people over for cake.... but he didn't invite me or my DH.

I'm not really upset that I haven't been invited to things, I'm more upset that my parents have the same kinds of stories where my brother just doesn't show up for anything anymore! At my cousin's bridal shower on Sunday, my aunt (her mother) informs us that no one from my brother's family is showing up at the wedding! From my point of view, that's pretty shitty of my brother, considering that this particular aunt and cousin were there for my brother when he was broke, and young with a brand new baby.. that they babysat FOR FREE.

Anyway.. I got fed up yesterday and emailed him a WTF email. He called me last night, and we talked things through and basically what all this distance stems from, is apparently my brother's wife has a problem with my mother.

My mom knows that SIL has a problem with her, she just has no idea what the problem is. My brother was basically just saying that he's not getting in the middle of it, though I'm trying to tell him that mom literally has no idea what she did to SIL to piss her off so much that she'd completely abandon coming to anything that my mother will be at. I told him that maybe if SIL has a problem, she should actually tell my mom what the problem is so that they can fix it... but my brother doesn't want to go there.

Well, frig that. I barely see my brother, SIL, or even my niece, and really the only time I do see them is at family functions, which they no longer come to... So if my brother's not going to let my mom in on what the issue is, then I am. I'm not going to spent the next countless years of our lives letting something that can probably be solved in a conversation be the culprit.

So basically, I'm going to tell my mom that I don't know any detail of why Angie has a problem with her (and truthfully, I have no idea), but that if this is going to be resolved, then one of them is going to have to be the bigger person and start the conversation.

I personally think that my brother's wife is being ridiculous. I know my mother, and I can almost guarantee that if SIL just told my mom what the problem was, my mother would probably apologize for whatever offence is the issue... they'd make up, and this whole ordeal would be over.

It's just so stupid. I don't really want to get in the middle of things either, but come on... somebody has to say something.

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